
BLURB: The freedom to love comes with a
cost.
cost.
As a guardian angel, Drake’s
destiny is written in the stars. Choice is not part of an angel’s life. Drake
never thought twice about it until he’s unexpectedly thrust into watching over
Grey, who inspires passion in Drake but endangers his very identity as a
guardian angel. Grey is more than just another human—he can see angels. When he
discovers that unlike his previous angel Drake will talk to him, Grey becomes
determined to pull Drake off the sidelines and into life. Attraction flares
between them from the beginning and causes Drake to question his purpose for
the first time. His distraction results in a decision that changes
everything—and not just for him and Grey.
destiny is written in the stars. Choice is not part of an angel’s life. Drake
never thought twice about it until he’s unexpectedly thrust into watching over
Grey, who inspires passion in Drake but endangers his very identity as a
guardian angel. Grey is more than just another human—he can see angels. When he
discovers that unlike his previous angel Drake will talk to him, Grey becomes
determined to pull Drake off the sidelines and into life. Attraction flares
between them from the beginning and causes Drake to question his purpose for
the first time. His distraction results in a decision that changes
everything—and not just for him and Grey.
EXCERPT
Prologue
“ABSOLVED.”
Unsurprised, Drake stared up at
Jordan. The result was no less than Drake expected, no less than he had
received multiple times before. Absolution by the council hadn’t helped then,
and it didn’t help him feel better now.
Jordan. The result was no less than Drake expected, no less than he had
received multiple times before. Absolution by the council hadn’t helped then,
and it didn’t help him feel better now.
“Then whose fault was it?” Drake
asked, knowing the answer but unable to keep from voicing his despair. The
compassion in Jordan’s sky blue eyes didn’t ease the pain.
asked, knowing the answer but unable to keep from voicing his despair. The
compassion in Jordan’s sky blue eyes didn’t ease the pain.
“You are aware of what cannot be
changed. There is no fault. It just is.”
changed. There is no fault. It just is.”
Drake shrugged, a habit he’d
picked up from the humans he spent his entire existence protecting. The motion
flexed his wings, and the dark feathers shimmered even in the low light of the
Hearing Hall as he pulled them closer to his body. He dropped his gaze,
hyperaware that his attitude set him apart from the other guardian angels even
more than his appearance. Among them blonds tended toward light-colored wings
and brunet to dark. As far as Drake had seen, only he sported platinum blond
hair and feathers so black they glinted blue in bright light, and he was
positive he was the only one worried about remembering those he’d watched and
lost.
picked up from the humans he spent his entire existence protecting. The motion
flexed his wings, and the dark feathers shimmered even in the low light of the
Hearing Hall as he pulled them closer to his body. He dropped his gaze,
hyperaware that his attitude set him apart from the other guardian angels even
more than his appearance. Among them blonds tended toward light-colored wings
and brunet to dark. As far as Drake had seen, only he sported platinum blond
hair and feathers so black they glinted blue in bright light, and he was
positive he was the only one worried about remembering those he’d watched and
lost.
Drake hated to admit it, but
Jordan was right—some things just were. Too many things, but Drake didn’t
understand why human suicide had to be one of them. He turned and left the
presence of the Angelic Council without further comment. He felt Jordan’s eyes
fixed on his back until the doors closed behind him.
Jordan was right—some things just were. Too many things, but Drake didn’t
understand why human suicide had to be one of them. He turned and left the
presence of the Angelic Council without further comment. He felt Jordan’s eyes
fixed on his back until the doors closed behind him.
Ralph stood there, his strawberry
blond hair curling over his ears and forehead, pink wings folded tightly
against his back, each blush pink feather tinted along the edge with a slightly
darker color and speckled throughout, like the freckles sprinkled over his
upturned nose and fair shoulders. Drake thought Ralph had the most beautiful
wings. He wondered vaguely if thinking so made him odd. He seemed to always
think about things no one else cared about. Concern showed in Ralph’s blue
eyes.
blond hair curling over his ears and forehead, pink wings folded tightly
against his back, each blush pink feather tinted along the edge with a slightly
darker color and speckled throughout, like the freckles sprinkled over his
upturned nose and fair shoulders. Drake thought Ralph had the most beautiful
wings. He wondered vaguely if thinking so made him odd. He seemed to always
think about things no one else cared about. Concern showed in Ralph’s blue
eyes.
“Are you alright?” he asked, his
voice soft, as another angel entered the hearing room just vacated by Drake.
Wishing he could sit down in the middle of the floor and wail out his hurt and
anger like a human child, Drake managed to remain in control, even giving Ralph
a small smile. Drake remembered when Ryan was two, he’d often given in to such
vocal protests much to the despair of his mother. Who could have guessed that
the sweet-faced young woman, so quick to scoop up her crying toddler, would
turn into a woman who would help drive her teenage son to suicide? Drake’s head
hurt from the unfairness of knowing Ryan was mistreated for something he
couldn’t control. Despite Drake’s smile, Ralph must have read something of what
he felt on his face. He reached out to grip Drake’s bicep briefly, in what
angels considered an extreme show of emotion and support.
voice soft, as another angel entered the hearing room just vacated by Drake.
Wishing he could sit down in the middle of the floor and wail out his hurt and
anger like a human child, Drake managed to remain in control, even giving Ralph
a small smile. Drake remembered when Ryan was two, he’d often given in to such
vocal protests much to the despair of his mother. Who could have guessed that
the sweet-faced young woman, so quick to scoop up her crying toddler, would
turn into a woman who would help drive her teenage son to suicide? Drake’s head
hurt from the unfairness of knowing Ryan was mistreated for something he
couldn’t control. Despite Drake’s smile, Ralph must have read something of what
he felt on his face. He reached out to grip Drake’s bicep briefly, in what
angels considered an extreme show of emotion and support.
Drake sighed, another human
habit. “I’ll be alright. Time will see to that. What are you doing here?”
habit. “I’ll be alright. Time will see to that. What are you doing here?”
Seemingly reassured that Drake
wasn’t going to give in to despair and do something crazy like retire to
corporeal form, Ralph smiled. “Zyn passed.”
wasn’t going to give in to despair and do something crazy like retire to
corporeal form, Ralph smiled. “Zyn passed.”
Drake paused in their walk down
the long hallway to study Ralph’s face. “Natural death?” he asked.
the long hallway to study Ralph’s face. “Natural death?” he asked.
Ralph smiled. “Not exactly,
though Zyn was a hundred and two.”
though Zyn was a hundred and two.”
“He didn’t die in his sleep?”
Drake closed his eyes, briefly trying to imagine watching over a person who
lived so long.
Drake closed his eyes, briefly trying to imagine watching over a person who
lived so long.
“Not him. Waterskiing accident.”
Drake’s eyebrows rose.
“Waterskiing?”
“Waterskiing?”
Ralph laughed. “I know, perhaps I
should have intervened in his going, but at a hundred and two, I couldn’t deny
him.”
should have intervened in his going, but at a hundred and two, I couldn’t deny
him.”
Drake frowned. “Are you called to
judgment?”
judgment?”
Startled, Ralph frowned. “No.
Jordan asked me to act as courier for the AIC while I wait for my next charge.
Could be awhile, but I don’t mind. It is nice to have something to do.”
Jordan asked me to act as courier for the AIC while I wait for my next charge.
Could be awhile, but I don’t mind. It is nice to have something to do.”
The arched ceiling-to-floor
windows on the outside wall of the hall let in the bright sunlight. The
ceilings were so high, angels flew overhead intent on some mission or another.
Drake never had figured out what they did all day. Despite the hardship of
being a protector, he was glad flying paperwork around wasn’t his eternal fate.
windows on the outside wall of the hall let in the bright sunlight. The
ceilings were so high, angels flew overhead intent on some mission or another.
Drake never had figured out what they did all day. Despite the hardship of
being a protector, he was glad flying paperwork around wasn’t his eternal fate.
“Really? What do they need a
temporary courier for?”
temporary courier for?”
Ralph shrugged. “He said
something’s coming up and he needs a courier he can trust. I asked if that
meant there were angels he didn’t trust. He told me not to be silly.” Ralph
rolled his eyes, his dimples showing in his cheeks briefly.
something’s coming up and he needs a courier he can trust. I asked if that
meant there were angels he didn’t trust. He told me not to be silly.” Ralph
rolled his eyes, his dimples showing in his cheeks briefly.
“That’s true; Jordan is Jordan.
Maybe being Head Angel in Charge makes a guy flaky after a while.” They reached
the huge double doors that stood open to the outside. The beautiful grounds
spread out before them, well-manicured, the grass green and unblemished. In the
distance, beyond the darker hills, the purple mountains rose on the horizon.
Maybe being Head Angel in Charge makes a guy flaky after a while.” They reached
the huge double doors that stood open to the outside. The beautiful grounds
spread out before them, well-manicured, the grass green and unblemished. In the
distance, beyond the darker hills, the purple mountains rose on the horizon.
“I suppose you are headed for
your perch?” Ralph didn’t look pleased.
your perch?” Ralph didn’t look pleased.
“Ryan was a good man; he deserves
someone to remember him as he was, and not with the distorted view of those who
drove him to his death. It costs nothing for me to do so for a little while.”
Drake looked at Ralph’s hand gripping his arm in what amounted to a second
embrace. Drake wondered if he should be concerned by Ralph’s extreme show of
emotion, but when he peered into the other angel’s honest round eyes, nothing
seemed amiss.
someone to remember him as he was, and not with the distorted view of those who
drove him to his death. It costs nothing for me to do so for a little while.”
Drake looked at Ralph’s hand gripping his arm in what amounted to a second
embrace. Drake wondered if he should be concerned by Ralph’s extreme show of
emotion, but when he peered into the other angel’s honest round eyes, nothing
seemed amiss.
Unable to handle more than his
own troubles, Drake let the moment slide away.
own troubles, Drake let the moment slide away.
“Don’t get so lost in your
remembrance you fall off your shelf.”
remembrance you fall off your shelf.”
Drake spread his wings to their
full span, not as wide as many other angels, but the silky black feathers gave
back the light with a blue shimmer. He spared a glance at them over his
shoulder; he supposed they were beautiful. “Unlike some, I have a safety net.”
He made little effort to keep the bitterness out of his voice.
full span, not as wide as many other angels, but the silky black feathers gave
back the light with a blue shimmer. He spared a glance at them over his
shoulder; he supposed they were beautiful. “Unlike some, I have a safety net.”
He made little effort to keep the bitterness out of his voice.
Ralph didn’t let go of Drake’s
arm, studying him with a grim expression. “Make sure you don’t fail to use it,
should the need arise.”
arm, studying him with a grim expression. “Make sure you don’t fail to use it,
should the need arise.”
Drake doubted he could keep the
others from worrying over him considering the bad luck of having his last ten
charges commit suicide. His record was unprecedented as far as he knew. Only
Jordan was aware he’d specifically requested to watch over gay males. They
required a lot of work. While things in their world were improving for them,
progress came at a snail’s pace and despair was too often their constant
companion. Drake supposed that one day he would have to face the consequences
of losing a charge to suicide once too often, but he hadn’t yet reached the end
of his endurance. Drake didn’t share his thoughts. He returned the solid grip
on his arm with a reassuring squeeze of his own, before he took to the sky with
a single push of his wings.
others from worrying over him considering the bad luck of having his last ten
charges commit suicide. His record was unprecedented as far as he knew. Only
Jordan was aware he’d specifically requested to watch over gay males. They
required a lot of work. While things in their world were improving for them,
progress came at a snail’s pace and despair was too often their constant
companion. Drake supposed that one day he would have to face the consequences
of losing a charge to suicide once too often, but he hadn’t yet reached the end
of his endurance. Drake didn’t share his thoughts. He returned the solid grip
on his arm with a reassuring squeeze of his own, before he took to the sky with
a single push of his wings.
The air of Home was like crystal,
free of the pollutants that thickened the air of Earth. Drake discovered flying
under the clear sky made remaining depressed impossible. Instead of the dark
final moments of Ryan’s short life, Drake found himself focusing on the
highlights. By the time he settled onto his shelf, high on the sheer rocky
sides of one of the mountains, Drake’s heart was lighter than it had been in a
long time. He believed Ryan deserved to be remembered as more than the
heartbroken, despairing man who jumped to his death from a bridge. Drake closed
his eyes recalling instead Ryan’s first breath, first smile, first step.
free of the pollutants that thickened the air of Earth. Drake discovered flying
under the clear sky made remaining depressed impossible. Instead of the dark
final moments of Ryan’s short life, Drake found himself focusing on the
highlights. By the time he settled onto his shelf, high on the sheer rocky
sides of one of the mountains, Drake’s heart was lighter than it had been in a
long time. He believed Ryan deserved to be remembered as more than the
heartbroken, despairing man who jumped to his death from a bridge. Drake closed
his eyes recalling instead Ryan’s first breath, first smile, first step.
Little Ryan was learning to ride
his bicycle without training wheels when the sound of someone clearing his
throat brought an abrupt end to the memories playing through Drake’s mind. He
opened his eyes with a sigh; usually no one bothered him during his meditation.
There wouldn’t be another charge for him until the wait time was over. He
wished they would leave him alone. Ralph stood on a narrow shelf beside the
broader one Drake was using.
his bicycle without training wheels when the sound of someone clearing his
throat brought an abrupt end to the memories playing through Drake’s mind. He
opened his eyes with a sigh; usually no one bothered him during his meditation.
There wouldn’t be another charge for him until the wait time was over. He
wished they would leave him alone. Ralph stood on a narrow shelf beside the
broader one Drake was using.
“Jordan sent me for you.” Ralph
sounded breathless; he must have flown hard to get there.
sounded breathless; he must have flown hard to get there.
Drake frowned. “Did they finally
decide it was my fault?”
decide it was my fault?”
Ralph shook his head. “No nothing
about that. It’s Noah. He’s resigned his charge, requested to go corporeal. I
think Jordan is going to ask you to replace Noah. They cannot deny the request
to corporeal. He’s already gone, Hawaii or somewhere, but his charge….”
about that. It’s Noah. He’s resigned his charge, requested to go corporeal. I
think Jordan is going to ask you to replace Noah. They cannot deny the request
to corporeal. He’s already gone, Hawaii or somewhere, but his charge….”
Drake was on his feet. “Is
unprotected.” He leaped off the ledge without a glance toward the ground. He
flew with a strength that soon left Ralph far behind, and when he strode into
the hearing room for the second time that day, he was alone.
unprotected.” He leaped off the ledge without a glance toward the ground. He
flew with a strength that soon left Ralph far behind, and when he strode into
the hearing room for the second time that day, he was alone.
“I’ll do it.” The words burst
forth as soon as he stopped in front of the council table. Jordan frowned.
forth as soon as he stopped in front of the council table. Jordan frowned.
“We need to tell you….”
“Nothing. Someone is unprotected.
I have nothing to do but sit around on a rock, thinking. I can think and work.
Is it in the stars for this charge to be without a guardian? If not, then there
is no time! Send me, now.”
I have nothing to do but sit around on a rock, thinking. I can think and work.
Is it in the stars for this charge to be without a guardian? If not, then there
is no time! Send me, now.”
Jordan stood, his wings spread to
their full span. He was an impressive sight with his golden hair and
gold-tipped, blindingly white-feathered wings. “He is correct.” Jordan’s words
silenced the murmur that rose up against the unprecedented happenings. “He
goes.”
their full span. He was an impressive sight with his golden hair and
gold-tipped, blindingly white-feathered wings. “He is correct.” Jordan’s words
silenced the murmur that rose up against the unprecedented happenings. “He
goes.”
So gotta get this one. 🙂